While in Alaska, I went hiking along a portion of the Chilkoot trail. This trail was one of the main routes into the gold fields during the Klondike Gold Rush of 1897-1899. The trail is approximately 35 miles long and can take from three to five days to complete. The trail itself begins near the old townsite of Dyea, Alaska and ends near Lake Bennet, in British Columbia and the Yukon Territory in Canada. Along the trail I was able to see some beautiful scenery, and some other interesting finds. But, I had to be observant. Or, at least pay attention to the guide.
|Bear Scratch Marks|
As we hike along our trail through life, many of us ultimately hope not to travel alone. There are those of us who like company for a while, and some of us who want company until Trail's End. I am one of the latter. I would like someone by my side until the trail comes to a natural end. However, I have learned I have no control over the other person and their journey.
As I continue this new fork along my hike, I have come to realize that I need to keep my eyes open for a new partner as he could come along at any time and in any place. We could be in a supermarket, both reaching for a zucchini, or we could meet in a Starbucks, I could be writing, he could be reading. But, does this mean I am actively looking for a relationship? No. When I am ready, or the Universe believes I am, someone will enter my life again. I am open to the possibility for that to happen. I have learned from my past relationships and experiences and hope I am better prepared for the moment when the Universe brings someone to me. And then we can explore our options.
Fear can make us do irrational things. Fear can also be a wall we must overcome. Fear of being alone made me stay with my partners longer than necessary, or healthy. Fear of not finding anyone better made me settle for someone less than what I truly wanted. Fear of having to settle yet again, may prevent me from wanting to continue hiking. At least for a while.
|Chaparral Trail, Franklin Canyon|
I know many people go to bars and clubs with the attitude of finding someone special, only to end up disappointed. Many people are trying online dating, or listing themselves on "hookup apps." But, by putting up a profile on one of these sites, am I hoping to meet Mr. Right and not Mr. Right-Now? Maybe subconsciously I am. But again, it goes back to my attitude. Many of the men on these sites are looking for Mr. Just-for-Funtimes, or at least Mr. Right-Now. I am not looking for either. First and foremost, I am looking to make friends, and if a friendship leads somewhere else, all the better. I don't expect the first guy I meet to be Mr. Wonderful, and I have been down that path of being a Mr. Right-Now before and I didn't like how I felt about myself afterwards. I don't want to go there again. Does that mean I won't have a good time now and then? Not necessarily, but I will follow my instinct and if it feels wrong, I just won't do it. And if he doesn't like it; well, then it wasn't meant to be.
And I will continue my hike.
|Western Fence Lizard|