Thursday, April 3, 2014


In my prior post, "Did I Just Have a Date?" I described an afternoon where I was meeting a guy who contacted me via a social group, not an on-line dating or hookup site, on a whale watching cruise that he had suggested. I wasn't sure if it was a date or not. It did not go well.

After I'd left my "date," (I'm using that term for lack of a better word), and headed down to the bow to try and get some photos, (and check out other guys), I did find only one other guy I found interesting who wasn't draping himself across a boyfriend, or in the midst of an established group of friends. He also appeared to be young, maybe late twenties/early thirties; not necessarily what I'm physically attracted to, but I was longing for conversation and he seemed to be a nice guy, though painfully shy. Seemingly Single Guy was with a couple of older gentlemen who were trying very hard to find their cute, young friend a husband. Old queens make the most interesting yentas. Oy!

The yentas attracted the attention of Mr. Perfectly Coiffed (beard and all). Mr. Coiffed might have been 30 at the oldest, every blond hair in place-including the facial ones, perfectly white pants (for a ship?), muscle shirt and jacket-vest. Okay, I'm coming off a bit judgmental. But, we're whale watching, not posing at the local bar. All right, so maybe he was going out after the trip and couldn't get home to change. I'll go with that. Actually, there was an email from the organizer the day before saying he'd reserved some tables at Hamburger Mary's, a local gay restaurant in Long Beach for after the whale watching trip. But, still, the majority of the guys were just in nice jeans and a t-shirt. 

Seemingly Single also attracted the attention of another man, a bearish man in perhaps in his late thirties/early forties. Bearish Man stood in the doorway eying Seemingly Single who was trying to participate in a conversation between Mr. Coiffed and his Yenta Godfather who actually was interested in Mr. Coiffed's accidental career of Interior Designer to the stars due to his work as a set designer. 

I kept waiting for a break in the conversation to talk to Seemingly Single. At last the break came, "Did I hear you say you were a California Native?" I asked. 

"Yes. Two siblings were born in the Central Valley and another sibling and I were born in the Bay Area." 

"I was born in the Bay Area, and both parents and one grandparent were also born in California." 



As the ship was now docking and I got to talk to Seemingly Single for what seemed like a nanosecond, Yenta asked Seemingly Single loud enough for all to hear, "We'll see you at Hamburger Mary's?" 

"Yes," he answered shyly.

As I had an hour drive home, and I had a headache that was now late into it's second day, I decided to find a Starbucks and then head home. Having located the closest Starbucks, (apps are indeed helpful!) I ordered my latte and as I was getting into my car, a little voice whispered in my ear, "Go to Hamburger Mary's. Talk to Seemingly Single."

And, as I'm trying to live in the moment and trust my instincts/Spirit Guides, I decided to go.

I eventually found the restaurant, then the group, and eventually a seat, ironically, next to Bearish Man, who was seated at a table next to Seemingly Single's table, with only the space between the tables separating Seemingly and Bearish. Also, at my table were another young man and a friend of his. I introduced myself and more idle chitchat ensued. We kept trying to flag down a waiter for a drink and a menu. Eventually, they both appeared, orders were taken and we settled in to wait for said drinks and food. 

The local chapter of the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence were holding a memorial fundraiser for one of their dearly departed members. (Something tells me she departs frequently so the order can hold a fundraiser.) The DJ was playing great music from the eighties, the Sisters were putting on a great show, and some conversation was flowing. Sort of. It seems since the guy seated opposite me had brought a friend with him to keep him company, that left Bearish Man and me to talk. I'd ask questions and he'd answer. And that was it. He seemed too interested in the music, I guess, as he was practically dancing in his seat, and loving every other song.

Oh, well. I tried.

And, I look at it like this;
  • I had an adventure,
  • I learned that I like it when people ask me questions in return,
  • I took a few risks (and survived),
  • I had fun. And perhaps that's the most important.
Oh, I also learned Dramamine and beer don't mix well.


  1. Love the positive spin you put on it all! :)

    1. Thanks, Greg! I'm trying to move myself in that direction! More positivity!