Thursday, January 2, 2014

So, You've Admitted It......

"So, you've finally admitted you want a boyfriend! About damn time!"
"I never denied I didn't want one. All I said was that I wasn't actively looking for one."
"What do you mean, 'Hah!'?"
"Why did you spend all that time in that bar chatting with that cute bartender?"
"To get out of the house and stop feeling sorry for myself!"
"And what?"
"And, go on...."
"And possibly make a friend, or two."
"Don't you mean do a friend or two?"
"Not necessarily. But, I did come home one night with a phone number once!"
"Yeah, of a lesbian."
"She knows guys."
"Did she ever call you?"
"Well, there you go."
"You can't depend on others to fix you up."
"No shit, Sherlock. I've got to make things happen. And besides, I don't want to be fixed up. Look what happened the last time I was fixed up! I met my ex!"
"There you go. So, here it is, a new year. How are you going to make things happen?"
"I don't know. I've got a lot to do."
"In terms of...."
"Work, the house, my next novel(s), reading for pleasure, a life..."
"You'll never know until you take that first step."
"True, but.."
"No, buts, but just do it. Like Nike says."
"Okay, wiseass, but how do you 'make things happen' while just 'letting things be so they unfold as they are supposed to'. Isn't that contradictory?"
"Not at all. You need to put yourself in a place for something to unfold. You had the right idea about the bar. It just didn't work out. You need to be in the type of place to meet the type of man you want to attract."
"I don't know what type of man I want to attract."
"Yes, you do. You've published your list."
"Oh, yeah."
"That doesn't mean your man, your soul mate, may look like what you want him to look like."
"You mean he's not going to look like that super hot, tall, dark, handsome, furry, rugged deliveryman that came to my door over twenty years ago who I can still picture clearly in my head?"
"He might not. And besides, your soulmate isn't going to walk up to your door."
"I know that, but damn, he sure was hot. And remember that phone installer guy with the crystal clear blue eyes and fur that poured out of the neck of his polo shirt? OMG!"
"Yeah, uh-huh. So, what are you going to do about things in this New Year."
"Well, some things won't change, like work."
"But, my attitude will."
"It has."
"What do you mean?"
"You seem more open to possibilities."
"I feel more open to adventures."
"What if the adventures come to an end?"
"Then they come to an end, I look for the lesson I'm supposed to learn, I move on and sing like Doris Day, Qué Será, Será, followed by a rousing rendition of I Will Survive à la Gloria Gaynor."
"But you can't even carry a tune in a bucket!"
"Oh, shut up!"


  1. Love it. How 'bout hanging out at a library and doing some writing. Maybe a hot guy would interrupt you, curious about what you are working on. Tell him over a cup of coffee!

    1. Sounds like a great idea, Nancy! I'll give it a try! Thanks for the thought!

  2. Is this a session with a shrink?? Wowza!! But, interesting points on both sides. Wouldn't it be nice if we could just have what we fantasize about? Then, at the same time, how boring would that be? The problem I've always had is the "looking" for it part. Jeff…I used to look for love before I met Keith, and then one day he stumbled into my life (or me into his, as I was probably a little tipsy). And now? I have more men flirt with me while I'm with somebody than I did when I was single! It's like they KNOW. LOL! I echo Nancy's sentiment. Try a library! The library is full of hot guys (well, sometimes).

    1. Sean, this was an internal dialogue following a session with a therapist where he got me to admit this (and a couple other things I'd been avoiding, which may or may not surface as a post here.) It seems to me, men like to flirt with someone they may not necessarily get, it's somewhat safer that way. Just my opinion. I'm not necessarily looking for love, but letting if find me. I'll definitely think about libraries. Maybe the one in West Hollywood.