Anagrams

As part of my morning routine, I do a lot of puzzles to help ward off Alzheimer’s, to keep the synapses firing and to continue building more dendrites in my brain. Plus, it helps me wake up and face the day.

I like a variety of them; various word puzzles, Sudoku, Blockdoku (a Sudoku/Tetris mashup), Solitaire-which is technically a game, not a puzzle, but depending on the specific game I do have to strategize. 

I have always enjoyed playing with words, maybe it’s the writer and linguist in me. When I taught sixth grade, I tried to bring in word structure whenever I could by teaching my students that the meanings of various prefixes, roots, suffixes and endings could help them decode and comprehend unfamiliar words. I tried to share my enthusiasm with wordplay but by sixth grade some students are just a bit jaded. I can only hope I planted some little seeds in their fertile little minds.

One particular wordplay I enjoy is anagrams. That’s where the letters of one word can be rearranged to form a different word.

For example, act is an anagram for cat.

One of my favorite anagrams involves the word listen. Its letters can also form the word silent. Go ahead, check. I’ll wait.

Got it?

Good.

I love this point so much, I had a poster of it in my classroom for many years.

As I’ve blogged recently, I grew up in a home where I didn’t feel heard and therefore, valued. My opinions didn’t matter. Therefore, I didn’t matter.

This brings me to the question. What is the difference between hear and listen?

We often use them interchangeably, but they are not. Simply put, one is passive and the other is active.

We often say we listen to music when in truth we are hearing it. But, maybe this is an odd example.

A strange sound occurs and we ask “Did you hear that?” It just happened. Hearing is passive.

Then we pay more attention to try and identify it. We now have an intent. Listening is active. (If we were truly listening to music, we’d be trying to identify the instruments, the lyrics, and maybe some various musical themes. Was that an oboe or a bassoon? Or perhaps we are indeed listening because it’s something familiar we want playing in the background while doing something else, like driving, vacuuming or washing the dishes.)

Right now I can hear the hum of the humidifier in the background. I know the sound because, well, I bought the humidifier a year or so ago. I am not focused on it. It’s there, just running.

I’ve noticed we often hear people without understanding what they are saying. We think we are listening, but I’m not sure we truly are. Often, in a conversation, we catch something that triggers us and we feel the need to interrupt and possibly press our point. Politics and religion are such big triggers for us because we have placed our faith and trust in these institutions or individuals and we rely on them to take care of us, governmentally or spiritually. We feel we are right and others with different beliefs are wrong simply because of our own faith, trust and belief system and therefore we don’t want to believe we have misplaced our trust. Or, those institutions have let us down and we no longer have faith in them and question why anyone would. We need others to see our ways for our own validation. Our ego has spoken and loudly.

I do understand that if we are truly listening to someone they may say something of interest which sparks a question in our mind. So, we become curious and want to ask in order to continue the dialogue to try to understand where the individual is coming from or even learn something new. But, if the original speaker is already defensive and misinterprets the tone of voice then voices can get raised, emotions get aroused and an argument can ensue.

The other thing that can happen when voices get raised is the original speaker just shuts down. No one actually ends up saying anything. No one gets to express their point. Feelings get hurt.

I also see this on social media. People misread or partially read a text or comment, go on the offensive and then get defensive when their point isn’t taken seriously. Often, these conversations devolve into name-calling.

I often find myself struggling with this. I know my journey is my own, as is everyone else's, and mine has taken quite a different turn away from what society considers the "norm."  On this path, I’ve had experiences I can’t explain without using the words “intuitive”, “psychic”, “other worldly” or even “statistically or logically inexplicable” and I can get defensive when others question the validity of my experiences and therefore, don’t validate me. I realize I need to validate myself or seek those who can understand at least part of my journey. I’m also learning sometimes it's best just to keep my mouth shut.

All this reminds me of a line from the song The Sound of Silence, “People hearing without listening” which in turn suggests people are talking without speaking, which is also a line from the song.

We have become so disconnected from each other and ultimately ourselves I often wonder if we can even reconnect.

Perhaps if we were silent more often when we listened and then spoke with more compassion, we could reconnect with others.

And ultimately, with ourselves.

Note: The video below is a cover of the Simon and Garfunkel song, "The Sound of Silence" by the band, Disturbed. I find this cover to be a very powerful rendition of the song. I hope you enjoy. -JB

Four Pentacles for February

Four of Pentacles
Rider Waite Smith Tarot

It’s that time again.

A new month brings a check-in with my New Year Reading. For February, I drew the Four of Pentacles.

Pentacles represents the physical aspect of our life; material, prosperity, abundance, etc. It also represents what we do or need; i.e., resources, work, labor, career, etc. to achieve the level of prosperity or abundance we require, however we define it, 

It can also reflect our connection to Earth and the resources the Earth provides us and our trust and commitment to the planet.

Each suit tells a story beginning with the Ace and culminating with the Ten. Pentacles tells a rags-to-riches story with the Ace offering a material opportunity and the Ten being the legacy left to the succeeding generation. By the time we reach the Four, some success has been achieved and the figure is clinging to his earnings fearful of overspending in case of a return to darker times yet wanting to maintain the current lifestyle to which the figure has now become accustomed. If the figure isn’t aware of his clinging, this could also lead to a hoarding situation, particularly if the card is reversed.

As Four is an even number, it can suggest balance in the story of the card. This is reflected in the save or spend mentality facing the person in the card. Does the figure save a little and spend a lot, or save a lot and spend a little? How does the figure maintain balance of his resources?

Numerologically, Four is also a number of stability. A stool can stand on three legs, yet four legs are more stable. So, here we see a beginning of a stable material situation.

Four of Pentacles,
Bianco Nero Tarot
by Marco Proietto

Yet, how did this apply to me in February?

I always see this card as a lesson to better manage my finances, especially now that I am retired. I must learn to control my impulsive spending or seek other avenues of revenue. Or, both.

Yet, I feel there was another lesson for these Pentacles, not necessarily of a material kind, though I’m not ignoring that message.

Mercury went retrograde this month. It hit me very hard. Harder than past Mercury retrogrades.

Retrograde is an astronomical phenomenon where a planet appears to be moving backwards in its orbit as the Earth moves along its own path, then catches up with and passes the planet in question. All planets go retrograde at some point and for varying lengths of time depending on their journey around the sun as it interacts with Earth’s orbit. Because of Mercury’s shorter orbit, it goes retrograde three times a year for about three weeks at a time whereas Pluto goes retrograde about once a year for about a six month period.

So what does this mean astrologically and how does this relate to me? I’m getting there.

When any planet goes retrograde, it can offer us a time to slow down and reflect on the lessons we supposedly learned during its latest transit, meaning which sign it is in for this current retrograde.

In general, Mercury is the planet of communication and short travel. Think of the guy with the winged shoes and hat who was the messenger of the Olympian gods. So, if he were sick and he couldn’t make the trip to deliver his messages, what could possibly go wrong? 

Mhm, you got it. Miscommunication, misunderstandings and the fallout from them. Also, as technology serves as a vehicle for telecommunication, it, too, can go haywire. 

Mercury

Now, this time good ol’ Merc went retro in Pisces, the sign of the fish. Two fish. Swimming opposed to each other. One swimming up, one diving deep. One reaches for the higher expanses of the heavens while the other plumbs the depths of the ocean. Yet, these two are somehow tethered to each other and sometimes straining to reach their intended goal. Pisces people can have an inner conflict of emotion (water, the ocean) and mind (air, the heavens/Spirit). Mercury also slipped a bit back into Aquarius, the water bearer, who pours his knowledge out of his urn onto the people below, hopefully illuminating them to his ways. As Pisces is a water sign (emotions) and Aquarius is an air sign (logic), we can also see the heart vs mind struggle amped up a bit in this retrograde. Pisces is also a mutable sign meaning Pisceans can adapt more easily to different situations. I sometimes see them like fish flopping around the dock trying to find their way back to safety.

So, how did this affect me and the Four of Pentacles?

Hang on.

For me, this became a difficult month, not only a bit financially, with the realization of really needing to control my impulse buying and to seriously look into other avenues of revenue. But, it was emotionally challenging, as well. 

But with Merc and the Fishies, I think those Pentacles took on a bit of a deviation from their traditional meaning. My tarot friends might look at me like I should have my tarot license revoked, if there were such a thing as a tarot license. 

What I noticed happening with me was some old wounds resurfacing in this retrograde. Okay, that’s typical for a retro situation anyway.

But, these wounds centered around being heard (there’s the communication aspect), being validated, feeling my self-worth, my own value. Ta Da! There’s the Pentacle connection.

My value. My own self-worth. So, maybe it’s not that much of deviance from their traditional meaning. I get to keep my license.

I’m trying to balance or find stability (there’s the 4) between expressing myself, wanting to be listened to and understood while accepting that the more I evolve spiritually and follow this path that I feel is my destiny, fewer and fewer people will be able to understand what I’m experiencing. They may accept me and support me, but who will understand me? Then, the other side of the Pentacle is, do they need to understand me or do I need them to in order to feel validated and less alone in this world? Or why do I even need to explain myself at all?

So, those are the Four Pentacles: self-expression, self-worth, self-acceptance, self-esteem.

Now, let’s march on to the card for the current month, the Seven of Pentacles. Oh, this should be fun. I can tell already I have my work cut out for me. Since seven is greater than four and both cards are Pentacles, the cards are suggesting period of possible growth in the physical/material aspect of my life.

Let's see. 

Seven of Pentacles,
Bianco Nero Tarot
by Marco Proietto

For more info on planets in retrograde, click here

Resilience

I went for a walk the the other day in one of my regular places. I needed to get out of the house as I was both bored and feeling a bit anxious. Plus, the exercise wouldn’t hurt either. 

I like walking in this park because it has some hiking trails in the foothills not far from my house. Even though it also has some nice manicured areas with some picnic tables, I do feel I connect to nature here, whether it’s manicured or left on its own.

I don’t have music playing while I walk in any of the parks I visit as I like to listen to the birds chattering away and hear the wind in the trees. Plus, if I have music playing, I might miss the buzzing of the bees or the warning of a Southern Pacific rattlesnake. I have encountered a few of the residents along my walks; house sparrows, California quail, ground squirrels, black Phoebes, a bush rabbit, mule deer and scrub jays. So far, a Western Fence lizard is the only reptile I’ve encountered. 

On one occasion, a coyote ran across the main lawn area, stopped suddenly and, well, left some natural fertilizer on the grass, giving me a rare glimpse into its life. Lucky me. 

After the fire, Oct, 2019

In October 2019, the Saddleridge fire destroyed much of the  natural areas of the park, leaving it closed for a period of time. I’ve visited the park a handful of  times since it reopened and this last time I was struck by Mother Nature’s resilience.

My first visit after the fire

The park is coming back to life, however slowly.

We can learn so much from Mother Nature.

She bounces back after every disaster; wildfire, hurricane, tornado, earthquake or tsunami. In some cases, the disasters are what is needed to keep her in balance. 

We are just as resilient, if we believe ourselves to be.

I’ve been a bit down and/or anxious lately, not sure why. Perhaps it’s the current political and social climate in the US. Perhaps it’s sensing a change in direction in my life, a direction I never anticipated. Or maybe it’s the approaching super full moon in Leo.

The reason why isn’t important, but what is important is recognizing my own resilience and surging forward.

However long it may take.

New growth in a burned tree
Feb. 2020

Feb. 2020

Feb. 2020

Feb, 2020

Feb. 2020

Photos courtesy of Jeffrey Ballam

The Knight of Swords Reversed

Radiant Tarot from
US Games

The first month of 2020 is over, so it’s time to check in with the card in my New Year reading which was the Knight of Swords, Reversed.

I must say I’ve been a bit puzzled as to what the Knight could teach me and as I tried to keep notes during the month, I felt stumped. But, I did come up with something.

First, what is his general message?

Swords is the suit of the mind and therefore suggests whatever goes on up in our heads; thoughts, ideas, logic, reason, knowledge and learning. Swords can also represent truth, communication and even justice, as true justice relies on facts and reason.

For me, the knights, in general, represent the age of those who have finished their "book learning" and are just setting out on their life quest; e.g., the rookie cop just out of the academy or the recent college graduate out to shake up the world with newfound knowledge as it relates to the theme of their suit. They just lack the life experience to either buoy their confidence or to help reign in their (over)enthusiasm therefore, they can be a bit unpredictable, anywhere from too naive to too hell-bent to fix the problems of the world as they see it in terms of their suit; in this case with the Knight of Swords, it’s his thoughts, ideas, and reasons which will make the world a better place. The Knight is brandishing a sword as he charges forward on his horse. Unlike the other knights of the deck, his horse is in full gallop ready to take his message the masses. So, he can be a bit of an aggressive know-it-all and definitely wants to be heard. And taken seriously.

Bianco Nero Tarot by
Marco Proietto

Yet, this Knight is reversed in my reading, which suggests I’m holding myself back from charging forward for some reason.

It finally dawned on me why that might be.

I grew up in a racist, misogynistic, homophobic, conservative home and I was expected to espouse those same values when among my friends. I have a memory from my early teens where I can clearly recall my stepfather saying those words in the dining room of our house. My first thought was “And how are you going to follow us around all day to make sure we do?” Innately, I also knew he was full of more than just shit. I knew I dare not express this thought out of fear of being slammed through the wall. Okay, maybe the idea of being slammed through a wall was a bit of a stretch, but the fear was very real. So, I learned to just keep my mouth shut.

Which meant I also learned that whatever I had to say would not be heard nor valued.

It’s a message that still resonates with me today.

And a lesson I still need to work on.

I recently posted a blog on this very subject where people express their concern for me. When I explain why I choose to live how I do, they ignore my explanations and continue their unsolicited advice about my life.

I am not heard.

Bianco Nero Tarot by
Marco Proietto

It hurts.

I’ve learned to shut up. 

I’m working on not getting triggered.

Some novels I’ve been working on have a deep spiritual message which seems to run very contradictory to the mainstream gay community. I’ve stopped working on them out of fear I won’t be heard, received poorly or highly criticized for my unconventional views.

I need to let that go and just write the stories for me; for my own catharsis.

So, I need to upright this Knight of Swords and just write. With the High Priestess at the center of this reading, I need to channel her energies of listening to and trusting my inner voice, put on my armor, get on my horse and charge forth brandishing my message.

And just trust that those who need to hear my message will.

And learn to let those those words which may criticize my message fall away under my horse's hooves.

Now let’s see what the 4 of Pentacles has in store for me in February. 

Bianco Nero Tarot by
Marco Proietto

Men, Pets, Relationships and Happiness

It seems people have a tendency to want others to be happy.

I get that. It shows they’re coming from a good place. They have a love and affection for someone else.

People also have a tendency to believe that what makes them happy will make others happy, too.

That is not necessarily true.

A former colleague of mine didn't like chocolate. She wasn't allergic, it just did nothing for her. I can't fathom that.

Another friend spends a lot of time at Disneyland. He says it’s his happy place. After all, it is “The Happiest Place on Earth.”

Maynard, she came to me with the name,
but it did suit her

It is not my happy place. It used to be. I am over it. Been there, done that, bought the Tee-shirt. Several, in fact. Plus, a few souvenirs, collectibles, CDs and DVDs, too. I may even have some of their own Disney Dollars still put away.

The mere thought of being in a crowded place such as Disneyland sends my anxiety into overdrive. Even seeing his pictures can trigger it.

When people realize I’m single, they encourage me to start dating. I ask them, “Why? I’m happy where I am.”

They usually reply with “But, you need a man to complete you.”

“But, I am already complete by myself.”

“A partner, a soulmate, will make you happy.” 

“Happiness is an inside job. I choose to be happy where I am. If you rely on, depend on, or expect someone else to make you happy, you WILL be disappointed.” They are usually lost at this point and I’m not ready to deliver my thesis on the definition of a soulmate. I’ve posted many blogs on THAT topic here.

Xena, such a lady

I view my happiness as if it were a fragile heirloom. I am not going to place it in the hands of another person and hope/pray they don’t drop it shattering it into a bajillion pieces.

Then they give up and suggest I need a pet.

And I offer my reasons why I disagree.

Of course they counter-argue because if having a pet makes them happy, it has to make me happy too, because, after all, all humans have exactly the same likes. And who doesn't like animals?

Recently, a dear friend of mine needed someone to watch her dog for a couple of days and asked me. I was a bit hesitant at first because even if it was only just for a couple of nights, it would still be a big change for me as my last cat crossed the rainbow bridge in 2014.

After negotiating whether I would stay at her place or her dog would come here, we settled on him joining me at my house to ease my discomfort. Plus, I would have my food, books and computer at my disposal to do what I needed to do and it would save wear and tear on my car driving back and forth checking in on him.

Part of the reason I don’t want or need a pet was seeing her anxiety surge over leaving her dog. This trip was an impromptu business trip she was required to go on. I recall the anxiety I had when I went on my Alaskan cruise in 2008, leaving my two dogs and one remaining cat with a trusted friend for one-and-a-half weeks. Plus, I started reliving the anxiety over “Did I remember everything? The vet’s number? Did I tell the vet about my friend taking care of my babies?” for that trip. 

Gabrielle, so affectionate

I collected her dog and all his accoutrements on the appointed day, drove him to my house and got him settled. He’d been to my house twice before, so it wasn’t a totally new place for him. But, he was now with me, not his mommy. Then I had to leave for a meeting. And I worried how he’d react being suddenly alone in a strange house.

The overall experience went well and he was very well-behaved given the circumstances of this also being his first time away from his mommy.

However, I came to further realize why I don’t want a pet.

After five years, I'd forgotten how demanding or needy they can be. Whenever I would sit down, he would climb in my lap. I recognized he was nervous because of the situation and gave him the attention he wanted. Eventually, he’d move over to the other side of the couch and relax. His cuddling did make reading a bit awkward whether I was reading an actual book or an e-version on one of my devices.

They can have their annoying moments. Every morning, I put out birdseed to feed a few birds on my back table. He’d bark at them. They’d fly away and then come back. He’d bark again. Since he could see them from over the sofa, I was also afraid he’d jump over the back or the arm of the sofa and get hurt landing on the floor. (I did have that happen to one of my own dogs, so I am aware of the possibility.) He’d bark at any noise in the house; the heater kicking in, the house settling, a neighbor walking by. I understood this was a new and confusing situation for him and just reassured him it was nothing to worry about.

Some of my furniture is not suited for animals. I have two leather rugs which would make cleaning a bit difficult should there be an accident on one of them. I burn a lot of candles on low-lying tables and would be concerned about a curious animal getting burned. I also have a number of plants that could be inviting to chew on, particularly for cats. One plant in particular can be toxic.

Simba, such a couch potato

I realize these are all negative aspects of having a pet and that the barking issue might suggest I’m more of a cat person, which is very true. As an adult, I’ve had more cats than dogs.

Cats are a bit more independent than dogs. They don’t need to be outside to take care of their business. I live by the rule cats should not be left to roam outside due to cars or coyotes. I also live by the general rule that the optimum number of litter boxes should be equal to the the number of cats in the house plus one. One cat needs two boxes, optimally. This is a bit flexible as the size and layout of the house can influence the number of litter boxes as well.

I admit that all the negatives can be worked around. I could toss the leather rugs and the plants. But, replacing the rugs could be costly. Which brings up another important point. I simply can’t afford it. The food, the necessities, the vaccinations and vet visits all add up and I’m not in a financial place to stretch my budget any further without it shattering. 

Mufasa, the gifted child with ADHD

I do recognize the companionship, unconditional love, and health benefits of having a pet. I've been there; I cherish the moments I had with all these precious angels. I miss them and all their little quirks terribly: Maynard, curling up in my lap when I wanted to cross-stitch; Xena, making biscuits on the tenderest part of my arm; Gabrielle, grooming my eyebrows at 3:00 in the morning; Simba, never learning to go up or down the stairs and always assuming his position to be picked up; and Mufasa, perhaps the quirkiest of them all, teaching me how he wanted to play fetch. But, I also recognize and honor where I am in my journey.

In short, having a pet is neither a responsibility I want nor an expense I can afford as I know what is emotionally best for me as well as what my budget can handle.

I just wish others would honor that as well. 

With me, always

Photos courtesy of Jeffrey Ballam

A Year in Preview

With every holiday we have traditions. Sometimes we add new ones and discard those we've outgrown. With my studies in the Tarot now entering their third year, I've decided to continue with my new tradition of a New Year Reading. For this year, I decided to use a deck I'd purchased last year which seems to have a strong hold over me, the Bianco Nero Tarot by Marco Proietto.

As the spread unfolded, I was a bit put off thinking this would be a difficult year ahead. But, I'm taking a leaf from my ancestral crest and slogan, Forewarned is Forearmed. What triggered me was the large number of cards in the suit of Swords. Swords is the suit connected to our mind and therefore anything associated with it; logic, reasoning, thoughts, learning, communication, analyzing, etc. Out of thirteen cards in the spread, six are Swords and five of those are reversed! In short, I see a lot of mental activity ahead and perhaps a lot of blockages or delays in that mental activity. Possibly some overthinking could be in the cards. So, perhaps these reversals are suggesting I have an opportunity to right them by being aware of their forthcoming energies and pushing myself through them, again Forewarned is Forearmed. It's like having an earthquake kit at the ready for the eventual big one. (Note to self: check on the kit and make sure it's up to date.)

January charges in with the Knight of Swords Reversed. I view the Knights as eager young adults, recent graduates who are charging forth to share their views of the world. These eager young crusaders have a message to share with the world and the Knight of Swords has a lot to say as he is the knight of the mind. However, as he is reversed he could still be a bit unsure of himself and how he might be perceived or he is still a bit tentative in his mission. 

February and March have the 4 and 7 of Pentacles respectively. The 4 shows us a young nobleman who is holding on to some coins, as Pentacles is the suit of our material life. He seems to be a bit afraid of letting them go, kind of maintaining some control over his property. Perhaps he's recently come into some money and is afraid of losing it. The 7 shows a figure contemplating his garden, perhaps ready for the harvest. Does he reap his rewards now or wait and see if they grow larger? As I go from the 4 to the 7, the increase suggests growth. Perhaps I should recognize my control issues and reflect on them, getting ready to make some changes for the better. 

In April and May, I have The Magician and Wheel of Fortune respectively and both reversed, my first Major cards of the year adding some punch to these two months. The Magician Reversed is suggesting a possible blockage or delayed seeking of additional knowledge or resources or even taking action. Perhaps I'm not pushing myself as much as I need to as the Wheel of Fortune Reversed suggests things in my life, aren’t necessarily going according to plan or aren’t changing for the better or worse. Maybe the Wheel is stuck because the Magician isn't doing his job, which, in reality, is me.

The 8 of Swords Reversed comes in June and is followed in July by the 7, also reversed. The figure in the 8 is blindfolded and bound, unable to move forward. (If I recall, this card came up last year in February, also reversed.) As Swords is the suit of the mind, the swords themselves represent our thoughts. She can't move forward due to her own thoughts; she has trapped herself. Reversing this card would suggest she's freeing herself because the swords are falling out. The 7 shows a hooded and gloved figure reaching for some swords. Is he stealing them? Why would he need more than one? This card usually suggests some sort of deception or loss. This pairing could allude to a realization of some truth, freeing myself from my own prison of thoughts and any thoughts of deception or being deceived are fallen or cleared away.

The Queen of Wands enters in August and takes charge. She is the Queen of Fire. No, she's not a pyromaniac or a pyrophile, she just has a lot of fire energy. She knows what she wants and how to get it, she's one determined queen. She's also quite charming and uses her charms to get what she wants. She's also one to help those who help her succeed. Perhaps I come into a realization of my own take-charge self and shake things up a bit. She is followed in September by the 3 of Cups, a time of celebration and friendship which would suggest I succeed at something. Or I just have a nice party with some friends. Isn't Labor day in September?

The last quarter will be an interesting one, with the last three Swords coming in; the Reversed Queen in October, the 4 upright in November and the Ace reversed in December. The Queen of Swords has taken the lessons that her son, the Knight, is learning and now has some maturity to add to her message. She is an honest, witty woman who will tell the truth even if that sword cuts a bit. She is one to see both sides of an argument and seeks fairness in her advice. However, reversed she can be a bit cold. She might be a bit more biting in her advice, less inclined to her feminine intuition. 

Could the Queen be suggesting I either become a cold and detached person or am not speaking my truths clearly? Have I not learned from the Knight in January? The 4 in November shows a soldier at rest gathering his thoughts and strength to prepare for another upcoming battle. Perhaps this is suggesting a moment to rest and gather my thoughts for the future. Whatever is happening in these last two months isn’t necessarily cleared up in December as the Ace of Swords usually suggests a moment of clarity or truth. But, as it's reversed the clarity or truth is simply not there.

The High Priestess at the center of it all suggests I really will need to trust my inner voice and intuition this coming year. Perhaps with all the Swords being reversed and the High Priestess as the focal point, this will be a big year for me to learn from her to fully trust my own inner voice and let the swords fall out, wherever they may fall, but hoping no one gets cut in the process.

With Strength as my Card of the Year (see my previous post) and the High Priestess here in the center of my reading they will be a good pair as I can, and should, rely on my own Strength to follow the teachings of the High Priestess.

So, maybe it won't be such a difficult year after all. But I do have my work cut out for me.